Happiness Exercises

Something happens to many people when they hit adulthood. Life becomes serious. It loses that lightness and freedom it had during childhood. It is a choice (conscious or unconscious) that adults make based on how they interpret what happens to them and the actions they take.

Laughter is a powerful way to bring that lightness of being back into one’s life.

Are you always the same person?  In some situations, you may feel stressed but strong, moving forward knowing that an adversity is at least partly within your control. In other…

As a kid, did you love taking a bath every day? I didn’t. Fast forward 25 years later, taking a shower is so ingrained in my habits that I couldn’t possibly fathom the idea of going to work without a prior healthy dose of body wash. …When a man at least ten years older than my Dad raced by me effortlessly in a 3-mile run, I realized that physical activity is an important part of personal hygiene. Why did I resist a practice I know is good for me, and then how did I break out of the resistance?

When pinned against the wall, could our strengths fire up in ways we may not want? What is the strengths-trap or “flipped” version of a strength? For the strength curiosity, having none of this strength is disinterest, having the opposite is boredom, and having an exaggerated amount of curiosity can be nosiness.

Remember the game “hot potato” that you played as a kid? Blame is like that. No one wants to be left holding it, since you might get burned. …All of us have times when we are clueless, and we, too, pass the blame to keep from feeling shame or embarrassment. Do you find yourself using the passive voice, saying, “Well, yes, mistakes were made.” But by whom?

I have had the good fortune of being born into a large, Italian family, for which I am utterly and completely grateful…. Communitas is a ritual-building process that inspires and revitalizes while reaffirming relationships within a community, state University of Virginia psychologist Jonathan Haidt and his colleagues. According to Anthropologist Victor Turner, building communitas is an essential step to activating a community to healthy family functioning, healthy child development, and other dimensions of well-being.

If you met Denni Chipollini before one of his speaking engagements, you’d see his communicative smile and feel his positive attitude. But you’d never guess what the story behind his energy is.

What exactly grants love the magic? Elijah Mickel and Cecilia Hall recently wrote about the five presents of perfect love. I would like to share this food for thought with you in February – the month of LOVE – when St. Valentine’s Day in the West and Yuanxiao Jie (???) in the East occur in the same month.

Want ideas for what to do with your sweetie on Valentine’s Day?

“Loving, selective, enduring attachment… scientists find such love difficult to talk about,” says Dr. George Vaillant, renown psychiatrist and author. Love as noun is hard to measure. Love as a verb or an action is more tangible. Here are some actions you can take tomorrow, based on positive psychology. You can share these with your partner, friend, or family member: the strengths date, savoring, partner yoga, gratitude, and a strengths gift. […]

Wishes touch on so many aspects of positive psychology. That is because wishes tell us something about what it means to be human. They frame for us our vision of what is important – both those things that are “big I” Important that give us meaning and purpose, as well as the little pleasures and comforts that ease and aide us in our enjoyment of life. Wishes help us define a vision of what is possible and show us what life could be.

What do you want more of? This is an important question in positive psychology circles. For me, the answer is more and better integration in my life. I find myself trying to balance a continual series of trade-offs between work and home. I want change, but behavior change is a finicky phenomenon. Sometimes, life presents conditions for a perfect storm of epiphany. The confluence of two recent events nudged me closer to cracking the “code of life integration.” […]

What helps in times of adversity? First, we can build better personal strategies for dealing with trouble if we understand how to calm our bodies. Second, we can keep our minds from being totally filled with thoughts of the adversity. Third, we be aware of our ordinary assets.

Did you know that the average American puts on 10 pounds between Thanksgiving and Christmas? And how much do you figure the average Holiday shopper has spent per year for the past 10 years? Try $961! We are observing epidemics in obesity, inactivity, and indebtedness. But here’s the good news.

I found this quotation on a billboard in the City Hall Square in Copenhagen while on holiday there last month: “Replace fear of the unknown with curiosity.” Recognizing moments of fear or anxiety is simple enough but entering a state of curiosity is a real challenge for me, probably has something to do with my practical sensibility.

Nobel Prize-winning neuroscientist Eric Kandel outlines five principles for this new science of mind. In this context, I like to think of character strengths as old good habits–correlating to strong neural networks that can be engaged for new learning and reinforced with practice.

As a leading writer and printer, politician, scientist, inventor, civic activist, statesman and diplomat, Ben Franklin attributed his success and happiness to only one thing – developing virtues. Especially so in tough times.

Why did Franklin care about habits and virtues?

Every fiber in my being felt raw and agitated, and I could barely concentrate. That’s when I pulled out the big guns. … I don’t remember how I discovered this most powerful tool, but once I experienced its potency I used it as frequently as I could. My secret weapon was walking (fast) on my treadmill while listening to recordings of inspirational speakers.

It keeps beeping, interrupting even the most focused thoughts and conversations: the call waiting signal.  Do you answer? Hope the sound will go away? Hope that voicemail will pick it…

How much of your happiness is up to you? Three-and-a-half slices worth. You are probably familiar with Ken Sheldon, David Schkade, and Sonja Lyubomirsky’s pie chart depicting where our happiness…

Focus + Humility + Questions = Momentum© Let me check something out with you.  Pretend for a moment that your friend, child, spouse, employee, or your boss said to you:…