Home All Designing Happiness for 2015

Bridget Grenville-Cleave, MAPP graduate of the University of East London, is a UK-based positive psychology consultant, trainer and writer. She is author of Introducing Positive Psychology: A Practical Guide (2012), and The Happiness Equation with Dr Ilona Boniwell. She regularly facilitates school well-being programs and Positive Psychology Masterclasses for personal and professional development. Find her on LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter @BridgetGC. Website. Full bio. Her articles are here.



At an event organized by Action for Happiness last week I heard Paul Dolan, Professor of Behavioral Science at the London School of Economics, talk about his new book, Happiness by Design (subtitled Change What You Do, Not How You Think for the US market and Finding Pleasure and Purpose in Everyday Life for the UK market). This book is an entertaining read about how to live a happier life. It’s based on positive psychology yes, but it’s not like the rest of the titles I’ve read. Over the past 10 years or so, I’ve read a few!

For a start, Paul Dolan probably wouldn’t like to have his book classified as a self-help book although that is what it is, albeit with added science. Quoting some little-known research, he was dismissive of this genre and its ability to help anyone become happier, but that’s another story.

Happiness by Design is different. Refreshingly it doesn’t mention three good things, expressing gratitude, savoring, applying your strengths, or any of the staple positive psychology exercises. It does make some basic recommendations, such as spend more time with the people you like and less time watching TV and on the internet, but I’m pretty confident that none of these will be new to regular Positive Psychology News readers. Instead the book starts by questioning why we measure our happiness by evaluating our lives anyway, especially when this method is inaccurate and the stories we tell ourselves often untrue. According to Dolan we’d learn far more about what really makes us happy if we paid more attention to how we feel, moment by moment, day by day.

Insight No 1: Pay Attention to What Makes You Happy

Dolan tells us to be particularly wary of the stories we create about ourselves, our lives, and our experiences because they can get in the way of greater happiness. It’s not surprising that we’re not as happy as we could be when we focus all our attention on what we think should motivate us and make us happy.

You might keep telling yourself “I’m happy being a working mother,” because all your friends are working mothers, whereas if you paid attention to your experience of being a working mother you’d realize that you’d be far happier at home with the kids. Or perhaps the other way around.

At the event I attended, Action for Happiness director, Mark Williams, volunteered a personal example concerning Facebook. He was an avid Facebook user, getting his fix first thing every morning, until he realized that checking on his friends and adding his own photos and updates wasn’t actually making him happy. If anything the reverse was true. So now he has stopped checking in with Facebook in the morning and feels much happier because of it.

Attending to what makes you happy is vital, primarily because attention is a finite resource. If you’re paying attention to one thing, you cannot pay attention to something else at the same time. So in order to become happier, Dolan advises that we pay more attention to things that make us happy, and less to those that make us unhappy.

Insight No 2: Make Happiness Habitual

Still on the topic of paying attention, Dolan explained the way your hardwired, habitual, unconscious System 1 thinking (the thinking which enables you to function and not be overwhelmed by the gazillions of stimuli you face every day) can be harnessed to create greater happiness.

One way is to shift your deliberative, conscious System 2 thinking about the activities and behaviors that make you happy into System 1 thinking by making them automatic and habitual. Like cleaning your teeth morning and night, activities and behaviors that make you happy can become second nature.

Another way is to use context-focused approaches involving priming, defaults, and commitments to go with the grain, nudging the habitual System 1 thinking into doing what it already does well, but in ways that make you happier. Either way you don’t waste scarce energy, effort, and attention because these actions and behaviors become part of who you are.

Insight No 3: Balance Experiences of Pleasure and Purpose

Paul Dolan concluded his talk with a discussion of the Pleasure-Purpose Principle. It’s not just whether our experiences are pleasurable that is important here; experiences can also provide us with a sense of purpose. He divides people into two groups, those who are predominately interested in having a good time (‘pleasure machines’), and those who are predominately focused on purposeful experiences (‘purpose engines’).

According to Dolan, having a personal balance of the two types of experiences is what really matters. He suggests that the pleasure machines could increase their happiness by specifically looking to experience more purpose. The purpose engines could increase their happiness by letting their hair down and having a bit of fun every now and again.

So, are you a pleasure machine or a purpose engine? Or have you already learned how to balance the two?


Deciding, Designing, Doing Happiness in 2015

Happiness by Design is not a self-help book with a ready-made or one-size-fits-all answer. Its value is in the way it makes you think about the underlying processes, contexts, and approaches in your life which contribute to or detract from your happiness. As we’re on the verge of  the New Year, it may be a good opportunity to consider how you might work with them or change them to design some more happiness into your life in 2015.

 

 

Despite a very enjoyable talk from the author, the book is probably not an easy-sell for most practitioners because it introduces a ton of complexity about happiness that other positive psychology books neatly avoid.

Now that I’ve read the book and heard the author explain why he wrote it, one thing is clear. There are a lot more miles to cover and avenues to explore in positive psychology before we get near any kind of agreement on how to increase happiness. During the event’s question and answer session, a woman in the audience asked whether people who are ‘purpose engines’ might ever experience such a thing as a eudaimonic treadmill, similar to the hedonic treadmiss experienced by people who are ‘pleasure machines’. Paul Dolan’s answer was that more research needs to be done.

My own conclusion from reading this book is that the more I learn about human happiness, the more I realize how much I don’t know. Although that might sound odd for a practitioner to say, I quite like being in that position.

Now, where’s that next book?
 


 

References

Dolan, P. (2014). Happiness by Design: Change What You Do, Not How You Think/ Finding Pleasure and Purpose in Everyday Life. London. Allen Lane. Also: Happiness by Design: Change What You Do, Not How You Think. Hudson Street Press.

Dolan, P. (2014). Five minutes with Paul Dolan: “Happiness is experiences of pleasure and purpose over time”.

Kahneman, D. (2011). Thinking, Fast and Slow. London, Allen Lane. For more on System 1 and System 2.

Images
Pay Attention ~ Mindfulness courtesy of Deb Nystrom
Brushing teeth courtesy of Vaughan
Balancing Scale – courtesy of Winnifredxoxo

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6 comments

Amanda Horne December 26, 2014 - 11:32 pm

Bridget, a timely article given that this time of year can be a good opportunity for pausing to reflect on our lives. Paul Dolan’s book sounds refreshing (to use one of your descriptions) and one that asks us to pause and think about our interaction with our own lives, rather than simply following a menu of activities that are ‘proven’ to bring happiness. Again it’s a reminder to slow down enough to observe ourselves (including how we feel), reflect on our values, and to take the right, purposeful action. Happy New Year!
Amanda

Reply
Angus Skinner December 27, 2014 - 2:25 am

Thank you Bridget, nice piece. Perhaps especially on the 27th as some of us at least experience again the rigours of letting go following a rare intensive visit from very grown-up children, such a mix of pleasure and purpose. And so great to recognise that there are a lot more miles to cover and avenues to explore. I look forward to the next year all the better for this review.
Best wishes
Angus

Reply
Bridget Grenville-Cleave December 27, 2014 - 6:14 am

Hi Amanda

Happy New Year to you too!

Thanks for commenting. The book is useful because it’s written by an expert in health economics, rather than a psychologist, so it provides a different perspective on happiness which has got to be a good thing. The broad principles established in positive psychology like the importance of good relationships are still applicable but the way you go about making them work for you may be different.

I’m going to read the book again to see whether I can establish the simple ‘rules’ about designing happiness which would work with e.g. expressing gratitude, resilience, optimism and so on. I’ll let you know how I get on!

Warm wishes from the UK
Bridget

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Bridget Grenville-Cleave December 27, 2014 - 6:16 am

Hello Angus

Lovely to hear from you again.

During his talk Paul Dolan mentioned his decision to become a father, and how (for him as it is for most people, he said) having children is a purposeful activity, not a pleasurable one. Of course raising children can be stressful, but personally I have found enormous joy in being a parent, not least because our son, now 12, has a great sense of humour (his top VIA strength as it happens) so we laugh all the time. It sounds like you have also found a lot of positive emotion in parenting, as well as a sense of purpose. It would be interesting to find out why so few people find parenting a pleasurable activity (money and practical considerations aside).

As to the avenues to explore, I’m reminded of a group email I got in the Autumn from a good friend and former MAPP colleague, asking what we thought was new in Positive Psychology. ‘Hmmm’, most of us said, ‘it seems to be more of the same’. I feel Paul Dolan’s book has come at a very good time.

Happy Hogmanay!

Warm wishes
Bridget

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Homaira January 2, 2015 - 4:33 am

Lovely piece Bridget – thank you! I love the personal balancing of pleasure and purpose – its so easy to label one as better than the other and fail to include both in life.

Happy New Year!

Reply
Bridget Grenville-Cleave January 3, 2015 - 8:58 am

Hi there Homaira

Lovely to hear from you.

Thanks for your comments. Yes I loved the simplicity of the message to balance the pleasure and purpose in your life, although there is much more to this book than that. So if you get the chance, do read it – I’m sure you’ll find it useful as well as thought-provoking.

Happy New Year to you too!

Warm wishes
Bridget

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