We all strive to be brave. If we are brave enough for long enough, we will sometimes fail. How do we cultivate the resilience to get back up and be brave again?
Steve Safigan
Steve Safigan
Steve Safigan, MAPP '09, is a practicing life coach (CPCC). He is president of Foundations Seminars and presents personal growth seminars specializing in positive interventions for healthy adults looking for more happiness, meaning, and connection in their own lives.
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Daring Greatly is wide-ranging, making it difficult to summarize in a review. So I will focus on a chapter of the book called The Vulnerability Armory. Brown asserts that we learned to protect ourselves from vulnerability—from being hurt, diminished, or disappointed—by putting on emotional armor and acting invulnerable when we were children. Now as adults we must learn to dare greatly by taking the risk of removing our armor and being vulnerable for the sake of connection.
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Shame resilience theory (SRT) was developed by researcher and author Brené Brown in 2006. Given that Brown’s recent TED talk called Listening to Shame has already been viewed nearly one million times, I thought this would be a good time to take a closer look at the theory behind the phenomenon. Shame and vulnerability are topics nearly nobody wants to discuss, yet there’s something that deeply resonates with Brown’s work.
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What does Positive Psychology tell us about positive masculinity and how it relates to femininity and sexuality? My curiosity led me through the men’s movement of the 80?s and 90?s, to the work of psychologist and author Christopher Blazina, and to Roy Baumeister’s provocative article about what there is that is good about men.
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It’s difficult to change. This is demonstrated by the number of New Year’s resolutions people make and how few of them actually persist. But what if most failures to change are not because of a lack of motivation, commitment, or willpower? What if understanding immunity to change could lead to lasting beneficial change?
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Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. She’s a writer, a speaker, a story-teller, and—as it turns out—a minor internet phenomenon. More than a quarter million people have viewed her 20-minute TED talk. Brown has dedicated her research career to scientific study of the inner workings of such messy and hard-to-quantify concepts as shame, vulnerability, worthiness, and connection. Brown claims, “I hack into other peoples’ lives for a living.”
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In comparison to self-esteem, self-kindness does not require that we feel superior to others. Self-kindness is not an evaluation of ourselves at all, but is an attitude we adopt toward our own failure and suffering. Researchers have identified three components to self-kindness.
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Steve Safigan believes personal life coaches achieve transformative results through authentic connections with their clients. He graduated from the University of Pennsylvania’s Master of Applied Positive Psychology (MAPP) program in…